Babies are born with strength and intelligence
One of the central facts of early childhood is that babies are born into a world entirely at the mercy of others. Their survival depends entirely on their ability to look adorable in their crib and mesmerize their parents with their innocent and beautiful eyes. Babies have a natural ability to attract love, which will keep them fed, clothed, protected, and alive. Young children readily express unconditional admiration to their parents and caregivers in return for their care. Babies are naturally inclined to love those who care for them and leave endless impressions on them. They were in awe of these giants who knew how to open a washing machine and throw a ball into a tree.
Innate desire for love and protection
From an early age, children have an innate desire to be admired and protected by their caregivers. They feel loved and can relax when they think their protector is around. As children grow, they have many pressing priorities in early childhood, such as learning to eat solid foods and figuring out how an electrical outlet or button works. But most of all, they crave love and attention. They are attracted to parents and caregivers because they feel safe and loved in their presence.
The complex nature of childhood
Childhood is more complicated than it seems. While young children naturally seek admiration and love, there may be a variety of reasons why parents may not be enthusiastic about their children. Some parents may make their babies scream and scream when they argue with each other. Others may resort to violence, hysteria, or lethargic despair. In this situation, a young child instinctively knows that he or she is in great danger. However, if this situation were somehow corrected, a small child could be left to die on the mountain. At this point, biology sets in motion a desperate but dark logical process: the young child begins to work harder, redouble its efforts to attract charm in order to survive.
The destructive spiral of self-hatred
She may feel shame and self-blame when her child’s efforts to attract her do not result in the love and care she needs. They doubt their worth and believe they are the reason their parents or caregivers are not caring for them. Instead of being an admirable person, they start to hate themselves. Self-hatred becomes a way to protect yourself from shame and anger. It feels safer to blame yourself and believe that you are terrible, stupid, mean, selfish, insensitive, physically disgusting, irritating, or shallow. This childhood experience is often forgotten, but its impact is profound and is forgotten as children grow into teenagers and young adults.
Overcoming Childhood and Inherited Emotional Patterns
As adults, we often overlook early influences and fail to consider the specific roots of our shame. We might think that feeling unloved is a natural phenomenon, like bad weather or the flu. Yet liberation awaits us if we dare to accept the incredibly incredible idea that self-hatred is not inevitable. There is no need to internalize early deprivation, nor do we need to idolize and admire those who deprived us of love early on. It’s important to understand and question why we feel upset, sad or treated meanly – because we’ve never known better. We must begin to overcome the shadows of childhood and understand ourselves and others better.
Emotional inheritance and character formation
The concept of emotional inheritance is key to understanding the formation of our personalities. Our parents’ style and the influence of love we experienced as children greatly influence how we choose adult partners and structure relationships. Through love, we can heal childhood trauma and develop healthier love and attachment patterns. By understanding our early experiences, we can choose different paths and create more fulfilling and loving lives for ourselves and those around us, those close to our hearts.
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